Clarity from Complexity: Walking the tightrope: a rabbi’s financial dilemma

Harvey Belovski’s Newsletter #69

There’s a peculiar dance that many rabbis know well. It’s the waltz between gratitude for whatever fee is offered and the quiet, gnawing sense that maybe our work is worth a little more.

We’re programmed to be grateful for the opportunity, the “exposure.” And when one has considerable outgoings, it’s hard to turn down even a modest honorarium.

After all, isn’t a small fee better than none?

But every time we accept less than we know our work is worth, we’re not just making a personal sacrifice—we’re setting a precedent. We’re announcing to the world, “This is what my expertise are worth.”

And the ‘world’, ever the savvy negotiator, takes note. Before long, the “going rate” for our time is barely enough to cover the cost of a modest kiddush.

Of course, most rabbis (and similar) enter the field with a sense mission, rather than for large fees and the nightlife. But there’s a difference between humility and self-neglect.

The skills required of a rabbi—including, but not confined to textual interpretation, ethical guidance, crisis management, and the occasional impromptu children’s entertainer—are hard-won and pretty varied.

Yet, somewhere along the way, we’ve internalised the idea that our work is a calling, not a career, and that calling should come with a discount.

The fear of walking away is real. The prospect of saying “no” to a low offer can feel frightening and self-defeating, especially when the bills are mounting.

But here’s the paradox: by always saying “yes,” we risk devaluing our own work, as well as the work of the rabbinate.

We create a cycle where the expectation is set, and breaking it becomes even harder.

The alterative is as obvious and it is difficult: finding the courage to advocate for ourselves, to gently but firmly remind those for whom we work—and ourselves—that respect and remuneration can go together.

Sometimes, the most faithful act is to walk away, trusting that in doing so, we’re not just looking after our own wellbeing, but raising the standard for everyone.